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» The life and achievements of Dr Elsie Inglis
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» Hidden disabilities: Pain beneath the surface
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» Scary photos
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» The 7-year-old neuroscientist wowing the internet
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» The cat killer stalking suburbia
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» Poetry from the heart.
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» A reader's response to your article on food waste
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» It's that time again .....
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» Need help with homework (Hall Effect)
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» Well hello there!
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» Madeleine McCann investigation continues ...
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» Famous Youtubers... Do you watch them? Do you dislike them?
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» Delicious and nutritious
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» Stardust on the Moon
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» Control your television with any object
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» Fahrenheit 451
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» The cartoon thread.
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» HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Feather!
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» A walk through Dominica, hours after Hurricane Maria
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» Quotes about Lifestye
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» MPs call for ESA death statistics to be published (Calum's List)
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» Songs from the heart
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» Bodies of 'hundreds' of children buried in mass grave
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» Psychics didn't foresee THAT coming!
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» Number 7777
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» 'Messy' mum barred from pub
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» Feather by the sea.
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» [solved] Multiquote ?
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» Cosmic beauty
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» Why men are happier people???
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» A Granma's Anagrams
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» Silly Endings.
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» Pink rainbow
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» Barking mad!
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» Invasion of the sex-craved spiders! EEK!
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» Surviving in Libya
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» Kitchen bat chase video goes viral
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» 10 things we didn't know last week ...
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» End of Summer Drinks
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» Bruce Forsyth dies aged 89
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» Photobucket
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» Hi from Brin
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» Delusions
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» BABY PLEASE DON'T GO ...
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» Wonderful images - fabulous music.
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» Photobucket no longer free ...
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» Problems logging in from your mobile, iPad or tablet?
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» Protest March through London
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» Our NHS
by Whiskers Thu 29 Jun 2017, 16:49

» [solved] Forum showing me as online -- but I am not!
by Kitkat Sun 25 Jun 2017, 10:41

» Day of Rage in London
by Kitkat Wed 21 Jun 2017, 16:56

» NHS European Health Insurance Card
by Kitkat Tue 20 Jun 2017, 21:26

» Postcards from the Shoutbox
by Whiskers Tue 20 Jun 2017, 13:08

» Shout Box (SL and LAL)
by Kitkat Mon 19 Jun 2017, 22:29

» A day out at the polling station
by Stardust Fri 09 Jun 2017, 14:48

» Functions of the Blue Toolbar at top of the Forum
by Kitkat Mon 05 Jun 2017, 10:47

» Light After Life forum's new address
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» Tick tock: The importance of knowing the right time
by Whiskers Thu 01 Jun 2017, 11:23

» Derek Acorah to appear in Celebrity Big Brother 2017 ?
by Kitkat Wed 24 May 2017, 22:38

» Publications
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» The world's longest cat?
by Whiskers Fri 19 May 2017, 09:22

» Nigeria
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» Redwater
by Kitkat Thu 18 May 2017, 17:28

» Maggie's Cancer Care Centres
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» I'm being chased by an otter!
by Kitkat Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07

» Eurovision Song Contest 2017
by Kitkat Tue 16 May 2017, 11:49

» This day in history
by Whiskers Fri 05 May 2017, 16:35

» Man rescues cat from London Docks
by Whiskers Tue 02 May 2017, 11:29

» For all you Elvis lovers
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» The Cat's Pyjamas
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» [solved] Problems with FreeForums - AGAIN!
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» Nature's Weirdest Events (QUIZ)
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» All That We Share
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» My niece & namesake - up & coming singer/songwriter
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» Strange and amazing places
by Whiskers Fri 14 Apr 2017, 13:54

» Lucky Joe!
by Kitkat Fri 07 Apr 2017, 16:43

» Rules of memory 'beautifully' rewritten
by Kitkat Fri 07 Apr 2017, 11:54

» What one word describes you? (Quiz)
by Whiskers Tue 04 Apr 2017, 22:40

» April Fools
by Kitkat Sat 01 Apr 2017, 22:44

» Happy St Patricks Day
by Jamboree Sat 01 Apr 2017, 00:10

» Terror Attack in London, UK
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Passport application

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Kitkat
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Posts : 3318
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Passport application

Post by Kitkat on Mon 11 Nov 2013, 15:44

AUSTRALIAN LETTER - I think the sender might have been upset!

This is an actual letter sent to the DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) Immigration Minister.  The Government tried desperately to censure the author, but got nowhere because every legal person who read it couldn’t stop laughing !

Dear Mr Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a television set and golf clubs and condoms from them back in 1997, and yet the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date ?

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand ?

My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years.

It is also on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off planes over the past 30 years.

It's also on all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.

Also... would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely bloody astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead !!!

SHIT! What do you people do with all this information we keep having to provide?

I apologize, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning.

Between you and me, I've had enough of all this bullshit!

You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my bloody address!

What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal arseholes working there!

And another thing, look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I can't even grow a beard for God's sakes. I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter.  (Yes, my son interbred with a Kiwi girl).  And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether or not I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? In the unlikely event I ever got the urge to do something weird to a sheep or a horse, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other side of Sydney , and get another bloody copy of my birth certificate - and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!

Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day?

Nooooo…that'd be too bloody easy and makes far too much sense.

You would much prefer to have us running all over the bloody place like chickens with our heads cut off, and then having to find some 'high-society' wanker to confirm that it's really me in the goddamn photo! You know the photo... the one where we're not allowed to smile?...you bloody morons.

Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting someone in 'high-society' to confirm that it's me?                                                                            

Well, my family has been in this country since before 1820! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor.  (You do remember the Eureka Stockade!)

I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army for something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances. I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL....Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.

However, your rules require that I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am; you know...someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN BLOODY PAKISTAN!...a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers - and are suspended from
the Commonwealth and United Nations for not having the "right sort of government"..

You are all pen-pushing paper-shuffling bloody idiots!
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Stardust
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Re: Passport application

Post by Stardust on Fri 06 Jun 2014, 12:15

Only just seen this, Kitkat, and we've all been through it. Aaarrrgh!!!
Thanks for a good laugh. Smile)


_________________________________________________________________
Be grateful for even the smallest thing, blessings come in many disguises.
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Kitkat
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Female

Posts : 3318
Points : 11953
Join date : 2011-03-19
Location : Around the bend
Star sign : Sagittarius
Chinese zodiac : Rat

Re: Passport application

Post by Kitkat on Fri 06 Jun 2014, 19:59

@Stardust wrote:Only just seen this, Kitkat, and we've all been through it. Aaarrrgh!!!

I know. You really do feel for the guy, don't you? ..... and it's the type of letter we all write .... (in our heads).  giggle 

    Current date/time is Thu 14 Dec 2017, 20:59