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Strange mystery

Post by Kitkat on Wed 27 Feb 2013, 02:16

It happened last Monday (18th Feb). I had a doctor's appointment in the morning. From there I went over to visit a friend who has just had tests in preparation for a long-awaited lung transplant operation at Harefield Hospital. The tests unfortunately showed that they are not prepared to let him have this operation because (1) his blood sugar needs to be kept under control (he also has diabetes); and (2) and this is the most important one ... his heart has recently become weakened because of all the coughing and this is where they feel he is not fit enough to undergo this operation. He is pretty down on hearing this result, as he had been placing all his hopes on having this operation and looking forward to hopes of leading a normal life.
English is not his first language (he is Egyptian), and although his spoken English is impeccable, when it comes to filling in official forms etc, he needs help .. and this was the main reason for my visit, to help with some forms and to make some phonecalls and speak to various professionals concerned.

On the estate where he lives there is private parking only, and a few spaces for visitors. He had pre-arranged with the estate office to have a visitors permit ready for me so I could park in one of the visitors spaces. He lives on the 5th floor and has been virtually housebound for the past few months, so when I arrived and found a parking space, he was directing me on the phone where to go to get to the estate office and collect my permit for the car. I have Call Waiting on my phone. As I was walking and following his directions, the words 'CANCER NURSE' came up on my phone screen. I have a number in my phone for the Macmillan Nurse who was assigned to me when I had my second diagnosis for breast cancer, back in 2009. This number is listed as CANCER NURSE. I have never rung that number and they only rang me once, back at the time of my diagnosis, checking to see if I was okay and telling me I could phone that number any time if I experiencing any problems at all.

When I got up to my friend's flat I went to ring the number to find out why they had rung me. My first thought was that maybe I had missed an appointment. Up until recently I have had to have mammagrams and check-ups every 3 months, but when I last saw the consultant he said I would not be needing another check-up until September.

The strangest thing was that on checking my phone to get the number, it did not show up anywhere in the log - which records every call I make, receive, miss etc. Nothing in the texting part either.
Anyway, I phoned the number listed under 'Cancer Nurse' in my phone and the nurse answered. She was with a patient at the time. Told her I'm returning her call. She said she had not made any calls to anyone all morning and asked the name of my consultant. She did not even recognise his name (he is actually based at another hospital, but visits my nearest hospital for consultancy visits). It's a mystery, and of course I can't help imagining all sorts now. Try as I may, I cannot see any rational, logical explanation for how this can have happened. Question

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Sat 02 Mar 2013, 22:59

Support,KitKat. Giving you support. Letting you know that a nurse is there,if you need support.

AP
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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Fri 15 Mar 2013, 15:31

Aussiepom wrote:Support,KitKat. Giving you support. Letting you know that a nurse is there,if you need support.

Yes, I'm needing it ... and how. Sad Took my cat Pepsi to vet yesterday to have his annual vaccination. They could not give him his vaccination as on initial examination they have a suspicion that he may have cancer! Instead now I have to bring him back on Tuesday with a urine sample and for them to do blood tests on him.
Feeling totally numb about it at the moment. Same thing happened to his sister, Poppy, just 2 years ago.
My niece and her bf coming from Holland to stay for the few days over Paddy's weekend. A needed distraction. They go back on Tuesday.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Fri 15 Mar 2013, 17:24

There you are,you see,KK.
Something or someone turned up when you needed them..... :thumb:

Sorry about your furry friends. Know what that feels like.
Lost our Yorkie a few years ago with cancer. It's like losing our other half...

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Thu 04 Apr 2013, 14:14

Telephone call from DWP this morning to tell me - based on my ATOS medical report, I have not been successful with my application for ESA. (It's only been a YEAR since I first applied!) "Not to worry", she says .... "you can always appeal" ... "you should do this as soon as possible and most importantly get a letter from your GP stating in detail how my condition affects my everyday mobility, i.e. walking, seating, standing etc etc"

Precisely what the medical examiner had said ... "If not successful, you can always appeal, and if that is not successful you just appeal again"

And said with such matter-of-factness that it's almost as though it's to be expected anyway ... as though there are perhaps only a certain number of "passes" that will be allowed on any one day - and mine isn't going to be one, no matter what the content of my application is.

The girl on the other end of the phone was actually quite pleasant and helpful - and it almost felt as though she was making this phonecall to warn me; (1) to break the shock and disappointment for when the official notification arrives, and (2) to inform me ... (insisting almost) ... about what I must do now ... i.e. the GP's letter emphasizing the everyday problems that I have - to go with my APPEAL.

Although I haven't yet had sight of the ATOS report, she did mention on the phone that it apparently states that I could possibly benefit from using a wheelchair. She said to me as an example - my reply should state that my condition indicates that I would not be capable of using a self-propelled wheelchair.

I mentioned to her also that I have just recently been diagnosed as pre-diabetic (in other words - just one point below) and that because of that I have now been prescribed an additional cocktail of medicines
Her response to that was 'GOOD!' Get the GP to put that in the report!

(This additional prognosis(?) means that if I am to take all the prescribed medicines now, it would be a minimum of 11 tablets a day). This is not counting what would have been the daily dosage of chemo tablets if I had agreed to taking them, and neither is it counting the liquid morphine set aside on hand to be taken 'if and when needed'.


She did say to me she was aware that I had now been awarded DLA on Appeal - and actually seemed quite surprised on knowing that - that the ESA decision had produced such a negative result.
I also mentioned to her about just having received the Blue Badge award - and that of course had been based on a mobility assessment requiring strict criteria for eligibility.

(I really do think she's as perplexed about the ESA result as I am, under the circumstances)
Kept repeating about the importance of getting this GP letter - with up-to-date information.
I already have a GP appointment booked (from way back) for 11th April (lucky - cos hell of a job trying to get an appt slot with them in anything short of 2 weeks) , so hopefully confirmation of that phonecall will have arrived in writing by then (said posting 1st class today) - and I can take it along to the doc ... and basically got to be prepared to be uncharacteristically dogged and demanding - and not leave there until I have this all-important GP letter to send to DWP. Not looking forward to this as GP will (I am absolutely certain of this) huff and puff and moan about how stressed out she is, rail about the "hundreds of similar reports" she has waiting and has to tackle ... etc etc ... Well, you know what ... I don't CARE! I'm here to talk about ME - and this is YOUR JOB! At least you've GOT a job to moan about and physically (whatever about mentally ...) capable of doing it. I am NOT! and I need PROOF of that and I need it from YOU.


Top of all this, have to take Pepsi tomorrow morning to vet for his ultrasound - as they are testing now to rule out possible cancer. They think the scan may discover a tumour. I think this will be the result too, and I'm prepared for the worst. Just don't know what happens after that - and whatever it is, I'm not too sure if I'm properly prepared for it.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Thu 04 Apr 2013, 20:32

Rooting for you,KK.....don't give up. Push for what you think you may need.....

stickit

AP
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Pepsi

Post by Kitkat on Fri 05 Apr 2013, 10:15

Just come back from the animal hospital. Pepsi will be anaesthetised for his ultrasound and so stay there all day. They will phone me at end of day to come and pick him up. Different vet this morning. She examined him while I was there and said she could feel a definite "thickening" around his stomach area, said 99% ultrasound will show a tumour there and said she must warn me to be prepared that most likely result will mean palliative care from now on, basically keeping him as comfortable and pain-free as possible, something to keep him hungry etc.

Crying or Very sad


ETA: Vet has just phoned. Said as he was such a "good boy" he didn't need any sedation for his examination. Everywhere else working fine, just the tumour in his stomach area which causing problem. Where this tumour is situated (very active area) means surgery not possible, so tumour will inevitably grow.
He is still getting hungry and eating, so now it is basically a case of lots of food, lots of drink, and lots of love and attention ....
They will check up on him in two weeks' time.
If/when it gets to the stage where he is no longer able to eat, then we have to think about putting him to sleep ... but ... that when it happens ...

For now ... I can go and bring him home now.


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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Fri 05 Apr 2013, 16:06

Pepsi? I love the name..... Laughing
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Pepsi

Post by Kitkat on Sun 07 Apr 2013, 23:00

Just heart-wrenching to see my little Pepsi fading away at such a rapid pace before my very eyes. He is due back at the vet on the 19th to check on how he is doing but I truly feel he may not last till then. I will phone them 1st thing - in the hope that they can give him something to ease his suffering - something to make him feel hungry perhaps, or at least to ease his what is now obvious pain. He seemed quite perky when he left the vet's and obviously hungry after having to fast overnight for the ultrasound - but he has not eaten or even able to sip water now for over 24 hrs and is now in obvious pain & discomfort. He is now also vomiting frequently, but there is nothing to come up; it is actual retching where his whole little body shudders and contorts and all that comes out is a clear liquid. I cant let him suffer any more.
I am distraught, and suffering with him. Sad
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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Feather on Wed 10 Apr 2013, 11:04

Put him to sleep now, kk. He is suffering and so are you. Don't prolong it. Be kind to him and end it. Then you can begin to heal. The longer it goes on, the worse it will be for both of you. I know how much courage it takes, believe me, but love dictates what you must do for Pepsi now. Let him go to find Poppet. Much love, Feather. xxx.



I'D RATHER PURR THAN HISS!  
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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Whiskers on Wed 10 Apr 2013, 22:35

Yes KitKat. It would be kinder to him to stop his suffering now. It must be so hard for you. So sad. I am so sorry to read this, and on top of all your other troubles. Sending love and hugs for you and Pepsi. catlick

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Thu 11 Apr 2013, 13:08

I go along with Feather. Honestly,Kk they just drop off to sleep. No pain at all.
My little yorkie just looked at me and slept away....That evening we were watching telly,feeling very sad. Something caught my eye,there was the tip of her tail disappearing through the bedroom door.
9pm on the dot! The time she used to take herself to bed......before that,Ken saw her disappearing round the back of his chair.

She was still with us......

AP xx
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Pepsi

Post by Kitkat on Thu 11 Apr 2013, 23:15

That's really sweet, AP

but sad .....




I know it's going to have to be done .. eventually (Pepsi) .. but ...................

I really did think that Sunday was going to be his last day, he was that bad - but he's perked up somewhat since then. Eaten well(ish) today and chatting away to me today. Even got a purr out of him.
Been giving him lots of hot towel massages .. which he loves.

So .................

No, the vet made the appointment for 2 weeks away (one week now). She obviously had her reasons for doing so - without having to spell it out too harshly. I respect her for that. I intend to fill what may well be his last week now .. with lots of love and attention. If he has another day like Sunday , then I think will have to bring him in before then. It's a matter of day to day now.
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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Feather on Fri 12 Apr 2013, 08:31

I respect the fact that it's your decision, kk. If you feel sure that Pepsi is not suffering, then enjoy your time together. BTW--cats also purr when in distress. It's a false belief that it always means they are happy.



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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Fri 12 Apr 2013, 10:25

Lots of hugs for him,KK. ....and it does have to happen,listen and watch for him.

We had big black cat years ago called Fudge. Always kept a bell on his collar so the birds would hear him.

That evening afterwards,we heard his bell tinkling in the spare bedroom....Always small signs that they are around.

I don't know whether you dream a lot but if you do,and it is a very clear dream,look for him in your dreams.

I often dream of Pippin,clear as a bell. Where I met a new guide. I dream of walking Pippin and somehow in the dreams,I lose her. She runs off. This guide called Brian,finds her and brings her back.

AP

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Fri 12 Apr 2013, 23:36

Aussiepom wrote:
I don't know whether you dream a lot

Fat chance of that! I can't remember the last time I managed a decent night's sleep, let alone chance to dream. crybaby
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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Fri 12 Apr 2013, 23:39

Feather wrote:BTW--cats also purr when in distress. It's a false belief that it always means they are happy.

Yes, I know. Poppy purred non-stop in her last few pain-ridden days. She most definitely was not purring from happiness.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Sat 13 Apr 2013, 12:16

KitKat wrote:
Aussiepom wrote:
I don't know whether you dream a lot

Fat chance of that! I can't remember the last time I managed a decent night's sleep, let alone chance to dream. crybaby

God bless you,KK. I should have thought of that..... thumbdown

AP xx
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Pepsi

Post by Kitkat on Fri 19 Apr 2013, 18:46

Pepsi's check-back appointment was this morning. In this last week he has hardly eaten anything at all, and vomiting and retching all the time. Obviously in an awful lot of discomfort - some days much worse than others. He obviously associates eating with something bad now, vomiting to follow and all the discomfort that goes with it - and just doesn't seem hungry anyway. Past week I have had to coax him, putting him in front of his dish, talking to him softly and stroking him and massaging him with hot towel - so that eating actually feels good and something nice to do. Even with that he will take one tiny little mouthful and that's it.

The vet weighed him this morning. He has lost a pound in that 2 weeks and the tumour has grown considerably. I was actually prepared on going there this morning for him not coming back with me, but when it came to it I realised I wasn't as prepared as I thought. They said they could put him to sleep today if I so wished. I asked if there was something they could give him to make him hungry and stop the vomiting and ease his discomfort - basically give him (and me) a few days of borrowed time, but days that he can actually enjoy and just be spoiled rotten for his last few days with us.

His final appointment there is next Friday - at 12:40.

The vet gave him an injection (to stop the vomiting) and he has steroid tablets - 3 to be taken every day. Hell of a job to get them down him - but the medicine really does work!
From the time we got back from the vets, he has been eating non-stop - well, only stops to purr (something he hasn't done much over last few weeks). Eating loads and then goes up on his chair to purr, realises that he's not going to be retching, looks back at his puss-puss dish and jumps back down again to eat more. This has been going on ever since we got back in the door. You can actually see him fattening up before your eyes.

I'm so glad he's got this week of borrowed time and I know it was the right decision. Instead of his last days being full of suffering, weak and lethargic, he is now a happy, hungry, chatty cat - enjoying life as it should be. I would hate to have to remember him as he was last week.
I am totally prepared for Friday now. I know it has to be done, but at least he'll be going to sleep happy - and that makes me happy too.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Sat 20 Apr 2013, 12:10

I was always told that when our time comes,we go regardless of what is happening in our lives,KK.
So I would say you are being granted extra time with your Pepsi.
God bless you both,enjoy.... happyheart

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Mon 22 Apr 2013, 15:55

KitKat wrote:
Feather wrote:BTW--cats also purr when in distress. It's a false belief that it always means they are happy.

Yes, I know. Poppy purred non-stop in her last few pain-ridden days. She most definitely was not purring from happiness.

Cats do have many different kinds of "purr", meaning different things, as they do with "miaows".

I read somewhere recently that "purring" by a cat can be a form of self-healing/protection.

Pepsi is doing a different kind of constant purr now ... I'm pretty sure that's the one that he's expressing.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Tue 23 Apr 2013, 17:06

How's he doing KK?

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Tue 23 Apr 2013, 18:27

Well, the tablets didn't seem to be working (steroids - 3 times a day). He started getting weaker and weaker and not even looking at his food - and that "healing purring" all the time. Had such a problem trying to get the tabs down him - and then I realised just how crafty he had been ... kept finding them in strange places long after he had taken them and I thought eventually digested them.

He was obviously keeping them in his mouth until thought I wasn't looking and going off and spitting 'em out, so he thought I wouldn't know!

So, only last night I had a brainwave. Crushed the tablet and used a piece of cardboard as a funnel. It worked! Straight in and down, no problem. Now he's eating like a horse again, fattened up and washing himself and purring (happy purr) and chatting away again.
I have the exact amount of these tablets to last until Friday morning, so he'll be going to his last appointment happy and feeling good. Very Happy

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Tue 23 Apr 2013, 21:33

We just do the same as you,KK. Or wrapped in a small piece of cheese. Pippin loved cheese.
Then she got wise,,,,spit the pill out and ate the cheese.....We used to find the pill buried under the hearth rug.
head-bang

Spoil him rotten,KK......but better than that,give him big,big hugs.

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Kitkat on Sun 28 Apr 2013, 02:30

Pepsi's gone. Sad

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Re: Kitkat's KK Blog

Post by Aussiepom on Sun 28 Apr 2013, 18:57

Watch out for him,KK......Watch for the tail and maybe a little purrrrr.

Sorry to hear that,KK.

My thoughts are with you.... Crying or Very sad

AP

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